Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Thriller Video: The Monster Club, Hosted By Elvira, Mistress of the Dark


Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, presented The Monster Club twice. Once on the evening of February 6th, 1983, as an episode of Elvira's Movie Macabre, then again as Thriller Video release on VHS and Beta. The Movie Macabre version is unavailable, so here are some pictures from the Thriller Video release of The Monster Club.

"Well, hello darlings. Yessiree bob, it's little ole me, bob. The gal with the set you won't soon forget. And I ain't talkin' about your basic Trinitron. (That gal with the set you won't soon forget, Elvira, Mistress of the Dark.) And welcome to another edition of good old Thriller Video. If it's spills, chills, and thrills you're lookin' for then Thriller Video is just the ticket. And speaking of tickets... you might want to take note of that clever segue there, folks... speaking of tickets, you just paid the admission to The Monster Club, the Thriller Video treat for this time around. Yep, the Monster Club... they have a two drink minimum, but that's not the bad news. The bad news is the bartender is Count Dracula (Bloody Mary's, anyone?). It's a ghoulish goulash starring a pair of macbredom's finest... my old pal John Carradine, and Vincent "Vinnie the P" Price. Warning, warning, warning, this motion picture is rated more than X. It's rated X ray. What is it they say? Forewarned is forearmed? Well, believe me honey, most of the characters in this movie have at least four arms. So, what'ya say, let's just all have ourselves a tall one, kick on back, I'll be back later, you're watching the Mosnster Club, exclusively from Thriller Video. 

"Whoa, what about that crazy Monster Club? Wasn't that somethin'? You know, it sort of reminds me of the club I stumbled into the other night in West Hollywood. Ya, let me tell ya about it. I swear half the people in there reminded me of me. They had on my makeup, my wig, my jewelry, and my dress. And the heck of it is, I'm only talkin' about the guys. Ah, ya, golly. But let me get serious, okay? While this movie has been going on I've been sitting here trying to figure out my own darn family tree. Gee, I sure hope somebody doesn't come along and shake it, because I'd hate to have a falling out with my family. If my daddy was a Shaddy and my mammy was a shammy, wonder if I'll end up becoming something weird. Vincent Price: don't worry, you won't become one of us. I won't? Oh, gee, but I wanted to, Vinnie. I've never felt like I belonged in my life. I mean, I've always been on the outside looking in. Just a big nose pressed up against the window of life. Want to know something? I was even turned down for membership in the book of the month club. Oh, well, whatya gonna do? If I'm not being rejected, I'm being ejected. I see your figure there quivering, ready to punch that eject button, well, before you do, let me tell you about some of the other Thriller Video treats available for your viewing displeasure. You won't want to miss Witching Time

Witching Time was a Hammer House of Horrors episode that became one of the 24 Thriller Video releases in 1982. Several episodes of Hammer House of Horrors, along with episodes of Movie Macabre, made up the bulk of the Thriller Video tapes. 

"And then there's The Silent Scream." 

VHS of The Silent Scream, another episode of Hammer House of Horrors, starring Peter Cushing and Brian Cox, that became a Thriller Video. The original episodes of Hammer House of Horrors were less than fifty minutes long, because they were made for television, so deleted scenes had to be added to make them long enough to warrant release on video tape. The Silent Scream is probably my favorite of these episodes that was released. 

"And here's one to keep you howling... Children of the Full Moon.

"Okie doke, that's about a wrap. Ready to punch? Be my guest. Oh yeah, before I forget... Unpleasant Dreams..."